Quote of the Day

"If I know Mary as well as I think I do, she'll invite us right in for tea and strumpets."

Jim Carrey as Lloyd Christmas in Dumb and Dumber (1994), one of my favourite, "turn-off-the-world" movies. Speaking of strumpets AND crumpets, my friend Mark and I wrote a tandem tale once called "Sand and Crumpets". It was set in Nevada, just outside Las Vegas and the story told of the most magnificent brothel ever built, called Palazzo d'Erotica. It was like something out of Bazz Luhrmann gone wrong.

My episodes tended to sound like: "The white MGB had recently been overhauled, its rich red leather upholstery and burled walnut appointments were a joy to behold. She gunned the motor into action and tore off down the gravel road to the highway, leaving a cloud of dust in her path, as she was wont to do."

Mark's sounded more like: “'Now,' said Mike in a deep well-modulated growl as he leaned over to Luisa’s dainty shell-like ear. 'Let’s cement the deal.' He ripped off his shirt, miraculously without tearing off any buttons."

We had so much fun writing it, and it got us both through some stressful times at work. We've started a new one set in the Australian outback. Rose, a gifted ballerina newly transplanted from England, struggles to survive the blistering heat and salt-water crocodiles of her new homeland. She is a sort of mail-order bride but Mark's already got her husband going walk-about or whatever... anyway, the rough-hewn brute has disappeared and I have no idea what is going to happen next! When Mark returns from his London/Wales trip, we'll continue the story.